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curious I was doing some research about telephonophobia recently. In case you didn't know telephonophobia is a fear of telephones, and yes, this might be a serious problem. Looks like I am personally not too bad, however, I am not well off either.
Turned out that telephonophobia might be caused by various reasons, but the major ones are as follows:
1. A person had a very unpleasant experience with the phone in the past - this is the most obvious way for a phobia to develop. However, it did not apply in my case. When I was a little kid, we had no phone at all, and we only got one at home after I started college. I did not have my personal phone line until about 3 years ago (isn't that exciting to know? :)), but I already had a phobia before that.
2. Telephonophobia as a result of a case of phonophobia. Phonophobia is a phobia of sounds in general. It is possible that a person had an unpleasant experience with some kind of sudden sounds in the past (and, as a matter of fact, it does not even have to be a recurring experience - even one especially unpleasant experience can lead to phobia development). Later this feeling can transfer to other sounds (like phone ring in case of telephonophobia). This is the way our brain works, unfortunately. Once a phone ring is associated with uncomfortable feelings, another round of associations kicks in, and a fear of anything related to telephones develops. This is the most likely scenario that took place in my case.
The morals of the story is that in order to treat the telephonophobia one need to find out what the initial stimulus was, that is, what sound(s) was (were) so unpleasant as to initiate the phobias chain reaction. This is complicated with the fact that once you focus on the final result (telephonophobia), your brain may even forget what caused it, and, what's even more interesting, you might not even have a negative reaction to initial stimulus that was the main cause your phobia developed! And at this point of time, I have no idea what an initial stimulus could have been...
Should I go see a shrink? Even though telephonophobia is not all that terrible (I can still utilize the phone however unpleasant this may feel) and it's nothing compared to fear of heights or planes, but it is still no way nice.
Sometimes I wonder if there are more than a couple dozen of freaks in the world who, like me, hate the phones...
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February 5 2003, 10:25:48 UTC 9 years ago
Is the dislike/phobia of the phone involved in the conversation, hearing the voice in your ear or talking to the plastic?
Have you tried a headset?
February 5 2003, 10:48:00 UTC 9 years ago
Slamming a phone is, of course, a much better solution than being rude to a customer. I myself often dream of stealing the damn phone when I leave this job, just like the guys in the Office Space movie stole the printer. This would make me feel better all right. Even the thought of doing it makes me feel a wee bit better. Unfortunately, I doubt that the phobia is going to be cured this way. Also, even if I know that a conversation is not going to be unpleasant, I still don't feel too well about having to make it.
So, the question still stands - to shrink or not to shrink. And that is indeed the question for me.
Not that I am trying to have the rest of the world solving my problems for me, of course :)
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6 years ago
February 6 2003, 21:47:41 UTC 9 years ago
Telephones
I don't hate phones but they do make me nervous. Then again, most loud, sudden noises make me startle. I used to be more nervous about phone calls than I am now.Phones are never very effective for communicating. I can't think through what I'm saying the way I can in an email. I can't use body language to help explain exactly what I mean. I don't mind them for short messages with people I know, or with people I will never know (restaurant reservations, for example). But I'm inevitably nervous when calling people I only sort of know, especially when they're colleagues.
Phones are also intrusive. One of the things I dislike most about them is the way some customer service people will take phone calls over human beings. And for more than a few seconds at a time. I believe that the person physically standing there took more effort to make a purchse or communication than the person who made the phone call!
Anyways, some thoughts.
February 7 2003, 06:12:06 UTC 9 years ago
Re: Telephones
Couldn't agree more. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who see the phone as the best method of communication, and, also unfortunately, these are usually people who have trouble communicating what the want clearly.What I think, is if you can't write down what you want, then there is little chance you can tell me that same thing over the phone efficiently.
February 12 2003, 10:22:30 UTC 9 years ago
am one also
I had never heard the terms for the phobias but am sure I could apply them to myself, lol. I hate telephones- answering and having to make calls. Voice mail and my answering machine are my salvation but I still hate the annoying ring (makes me nervous for the rest of the day.) Telemarketers are evil; before I had my number on the no-call list for my state I'd get up to 5 calls every day from telemarketers and they do not leave messages so then I would worry about who might be calling, etc. Caller ID is really nice also.Have you looked at this in relation to larger social phobias or avoidant personality disorder?
February 12 2003, 11:26:29 UTC 9 years ago
Re: am one also
> Have you looked at this in relation to larger social phobias or avoidant personality disorder?No, I didn't go that far. Granted, I am not very fond of hanging out with people (unless I know them real well), but I am neither sociophobic nor avoidant -> never had a problem in that field (*sigh of relief*). It's true, however, that many people who don't like phones don't like talking to real live people either. In my case it's not so.
Have you ever thought about going to a doctor with this problem? I'm afraid that if I do they will just turn me into a cash cow for several years and then will say there is nothing they can do. Looks like this happens to phobics all the time.
December 27 2003, 02:03:57 UTC 8 years ago
re.
wow, I have a fear of telephones as well. Although the sound of it ringingdoesnt bother me and I dont mind picking it up at all, I cannot ever pick it up myself to call anyone, or at least when I do Ill debate about for awhile and avoid it, even for like schedualling a doctors appointment w/e. so for the kicks I searched for phonephobia and found your journal, I guess Im not the only freak, hooray! I also found this rather interesting http://www.changethatsrightnow.com/probDecember 28 2003, 16:54:41 UTC 8 years ago
Re: re.
Well, thanks for the "freak" all right :)Anyway, I guess the problem is not as unique as people who have it tend to think.
Nice link, by the way. Of course, they want money, and I am personally not at the point of being that desperate, by it is good to know that the problem is recognized.
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Anonymous
January 20 2004, 16:10:58 UTC 8 years ago
Re:Telephonophobia
Hey, i've been researching phobias recently for an art project and i came across this page. I too have a phone phobia, i really don't know the source of the problem, i've read up so much about the phobia and for me it seems to be a mixture of everything...It's actually surprising the amount of people who have this phobia, although it varies in degrees of seriousness. I myself have NEVER answered the phone, i can call people but only a few friends who i know very well. I'm only 16 at the moment but i only started calling people a few years ago after years of just not using the phone at all. When i do call people i get extremely anxious, i shake, etc and it takes me a long time to dial the number. I find it easier for someone else to dial or for me to just stop thinking about it, which is obviously hard......
Anyway, you mentioned visiting a shrink which is something i would love to do because i can't live with this phobia any more, it's such a hinderence and causes so much stress....My main problem is that most of the people in my life don't take it seriously and just laugh at it or tell me to 'get over it' and it's not that simple. So, personally i wish i had some sort of help without feeling like it's my own problem that i should just deal with by myself....
Natalie, 15, England.
January 21 2004, 14:27:46 UTC 8 years ago
Re:Telephonophobia
I understand you perfectly well. While I myself am not that bad when it comes to handling phone (ironically, I do a lot of that at work, however (and this may come as a surprise to my boss), I, like you, never ever actually answer the phone - I just return the phone calls later after listening to the messages. It is better at home where I have caller ID and can see right away if the call is from someone I know and am comfortable talking on the phone with.I am not sure if my next piece of advise is going to help you or not, but I found out that talking on the phone with telemarketers helps cope with the phobia tremendously. After all, you know that they are scum, and since they called you first, it is not going to be considered a prank call on your part. Don't be overly rude with them, but have fun by all means. Nothing treats phobias better than having a little fun.
Of course, it would require knowing when the call is from a telemarketer. It is pretty easy here in US (caller ID will always show an unidentified or blocked call), but I do not know much about how this would work in England.
Anyway, don't ever get desperate. Phobia or not, you have a life to live. Do not ever let your life revolve around the phobia. A shrink might help you, obviously, but I myself am a huge believer in, well, myself. So far it is working.
Good luck!
April 17 2004, 23:17:45 UTC 8 years ago
a possible solution
I've been researching phobias myself lately for an assignment on the subject of "human mind and behaviour", and the best self-treatment that I know of is by way of "extinction". Unfortunately this involves a lot of work. It is done by facing the "conditioned stimulus" (ie. the phone that causes you fear) in a non threatening situation until your brain makes the connection that there is no longer any reason to fear that, so that the "conditioned response" (ie. the actual fear, sweating, shaking, etc. that you would experience) becomes extinct.I must admit that I do not have "telephonephobia", but I can understand your apprehension as I have been trying to use this method to counter a fear of huntsman spiders (a non-venomous Australian spider) for a long time now, with very little progress. Fortunately you have the advantage of being able to predict the behaviour of what causes you fear (naggling in the back of my mind is always "what if it runs up my arm" when I try to touch one to condition myself to the fact that it will not harm me). Perhaps you could get a friend to call you at an arranged time. If you don't answer - then that's ok, try again tomorrow, but try to remind yourself that (and especially if you have caller id to confirm this) at the end of the day, it's only going to be a friend at the other end of the line. Having a quiet phone may help too, although as I gather the sound is not quite what you "phonephobic" are afraid of yourself. As for some of the other respondants, maybe you do suffer this.
Maybe you could even start with having a friend with you physically at the start to help coax you to the phone, or even answer it for you and then pass it on to you.
Mind you, phones aren't absolutely essential in life. I don't really use them, and being a poor university student, do not own a mobile phone. So you're not missing out on the best thing in life, but I think being able to use phones without too much apprehension (it's normal to get nervous sometimes before ringing people) would improve your quality of life. If this doesn't work and you can afford it, and want to get help, then I think medical help would be a worthwhile consideration.
April 19 2004, 06:27:16 UTC 8 years ago
Re: a possible solution
Thanks for the answer. Fortunately for me, I am not so bad with the phone as to need any of the steps you outlined. Granted, I hate to answer the phone and initiate calls myself, but the former "threat" is easily assisted by the caller ID (and voicemail at work), and the latter is addressed by existence of email (and, occasionally, spouse :)) Viva technology! :)Tuning self out before the call also helps. It is a little hard to describe how to do that, but it helps immensely. What I usually do is return all the calls I have at once. Sure beats calling 10+ times separately during the day not to mention it is easier on the nerves. This way I handle a dozen or so calls I need to return as one, and try to do it as a part of the flow. Sometimes it does not work really well, but the fact that it does at least occasionally puts this technique on top of my list.
As for the spiders bit you mentioned - although it may be terribly illiterate and uncourteous of me to ask - but does it help to know that you can squash the thing at any moment? After all, a spider is small and easy to get rid off.
8 years ago
Anonymous
May 11 2004, 16:40:24 UTC 8 years ago
telophonephobia
I'm glad that I found some people who can understand me, instead of some ignorant person who cant understand how I feel. I've never really called a lot of people before so I haven't noticed this until I tried to call a friend I haven't seen in a while and I got so nervous that I just hung up. I guess my problem is that I am scared that I won't have anything to say or that the other person won't want to talk to me anyway.I'm not sure how I can get rid of this nagging fear but maybe I should just aske someone to call me instead?May 12 2004, 05:57:49 UTC 8 years ago
Re: telophonephobia
If you can get someone call you, and not feel anxious as a result, I envy you :) I personally do not like incoming calls just as much as the ones I need to make. In any case, good luck to you. I understand you completely.May 13 2004, 13:22:17 UTC 8 years ago
For me, the reason is a general uncomfortability with sounds-- I have a difficult time understanding voices over the phone as a result of an auditory processing disorder. Thus, phone conversations take a lot of energy and concentration for me, more so than for the average person. There's also the worry that I might be interrupting someone, or might end up in a situation to which I don't know how to respond...
::sigh:: Why can't people just use e-mail instead?
May 17 2004, 06:11:50 UTC 8 years ago
Why can't people just use e-mail instead?
They must all have an emailophobia :)) At least this is the impression I get at my work. People would call back to respond to an email ... grrr...Anonymous
3 years ago
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July 18 2004, 15:41:53 UTC 7 years ago
Anonymous
July 30 2004, 13:26:21 UTC 7 years ago
The sound of a ringing telephone or a pager disturbs me to no end. It's like a horror movie. As a matter of fact, I get very anxious when I have to call someone now. I can't stand it. I just have to write them a letter or end up going and seeing them personally because I refuse to use the phone. I miss out on alot because of this phobia. It's odd that I don't have a fear of spiders, death, planes or heights, but phones (and bees) freak the poop right out of me.
Anonymous
October 19 2004, 21:33:37 UTC 7 years ago
Me too
Hi, I just wanted to thank you for writing this thread. I have the same exact thing and it developed very gradually over a number of years. I didn't even really notice how bad it had gotten until now. It seems like forcing myself to make phone calls must be the only situation. I did used to have social phobia and bad fear of public speaking and managed to get over that by forcing myself to do it over and over again. I also did relaxation exercises and stuff. Oh, and antidepressants helped too. I didn't really figure it out that this was a last vestige of social phobia for me. Thanks for the commiseration!November 24 2004, 01:49:44 UTC 7 years ago
think i have this problem
i was looking up this phobia or google to try to figure out what the official name is because i think i might have it, and i got to your lj. and now the phone is ringing again...and it's that guy who made me telephonophobic in the first place...Anonymous
May 1 2005, 06:50:58 UTC 7 years ago
Re: think i have this problem
Whoa - lots of telephonophobes out there. I am doing prac teaching and have to teach a lesson on telephone communications. THis is a scary concept because I detest using the phone myself. I really don't think that my subconscious has suppressed an event which led to this phobia. I put it down to:1) I rely on hand gestures and facial expressions a lot when I speak to someone... this has to be suppressed when on the phone.
2) I can't see the other person's body language - makes me nervous.
3) Speaking on the phone consumes my full attention - I get exceedingly stressed when someone tries to talk to me when I am on the phone with someone else.
There are probably more reasons... but that is my self-psychoanalysis.
Anonymous
6 years ago
Anonymous
May 9 2005, 23:43:02 UTC 7 years ago
telephonophobia
I also have telephonophobia, and have always had it to some degree.When I was a little kid, I wouldn't talk on the phone at all. The first time someone called and asked to talk to me, I wouldn't even take the reciever. The very sound of a phone ringing used to make me jump, but now ring tones are softer, so it doesn't startle me anymore. (I am also extrememly startled my unexpected knocks at the door- don't know if that's related.)
I was very relieved when they came out with caller ID, so at least now I'm not afraid to answer the phone anymore (usually). Calling someone is a whole different story though. If I have to call someone I don't know, I am filled with dread and I have to prepare and plan what I am going to say. I am even relunctant to call people I do know. I also have trouble raising my voice in various situations.
-TK
Anonymous
May 13 2005, 02:42:34 UTC 7 years ago
omg!
omg I thought I was so weird. For 26 years I thought there was something wrong with me. I can't believe there is a name.Help!
Anonymous
June 22 2005, 21:34:50 UTC 6 years ago
me to (i think)
i think i may have accidentally posted this somewhere else alswell sorryi don't have a fear of answering the phone or even talking on the phone which i think is why my mum can't seem to understand my fear (me and my mate went through a stage of speaking on the phone for two hours every tuesday) my problem is phoning someone. i shake i feel sick i sweat etc. don't really know why though, i am usually better if i know the person i am phoning well. for example i have no problem - well very little - phoning my mate hannah as i know her really well and i know her parents well enough not to be scared if she doesn't answer.
hope that makes sense. can't believe that this is an actual fear though, i honestly thought that it was me being stupid. i only came across this website looking for info for my A level psychology course work, glad i did. good luck to you all
Anonymous
July 6 2005, 04:13:38 UTC 6 years ago
...And another one...
I'm going to sound like a broken record, but I'm another one. It's such a comfort to read so many others who have had this problem. I found your posting because I was sitting here with three phone calls to make, and I've been putting it off and putting it off and feeling tense and a little sick, and haven't been able to do it yet.Like most others, although I really dislike a ringing phone I don't have trouble answering it, usually, but making a call is sometimes downright impossible. If anyone has tips to share on ways to overcome this that've worked for them, like behavior mod, or a reward system...I would be grateful.
A funny quirk--once I make myself pick up the phone and make the first call, the phobia gets easier with each successive call until I'm really on a roll and have no trouble at all calling more numbers...until I stop. Then it starts all over again. I know that I'll be fine, yet I still suffer the tortures of the damned trying to get myself to make that first call. I have had no phone traumas in the past, and I tend to do fine on the phone in terms of processing info--tho I vastly prefer email.
I also have the hatred of voice mail messages, and will sometimes put off picking up my messages for hours. Sigh.
And now I've procrastinated enough so I don't have to make these calls til the morning. Yay...?
Anonymous
August 14 2005, 16:52:29 UTC 6 years ago
Funny
Its so funny that so many posts are people like - oh my god, I'm not alone. I too feel this way. I also used to put off getting my voicemail - then one day I was like, why do I have to have voice mail? The answer was, I don't! So I got rid of it. Now every day coming home from work I don't have that stress, but I of course have to see the caller ID (what a godsend for us huh?) to see who called. I too can get on a roll and making calls is easier as I go, but then another day, another call, and it is a nightmare all over again.Anonymous
August 12 2005, 06:28:31 UTC 6 years ago
Me as well
It's really heartening to read that others fear using the phone like I do. I'm almost 22 and have had a problem making/receiving telephone calls for many years. If the phone rings, I let it. If I need to contact someone, I either find another form of contact or get someone else to call them. I can call my brother, make the odd phonecall to a close friend or order a take away but that's about it. Having to answer the phone at work or home, or make enquiries though fills me with absolute fear and anxiety.My dad used to hate using the phone and suffered other anxiety problems as a young adult, like I do today ie. Hatred of doing presentations or anything that involves being the focus of attention, eating in public, attending social functions etc. My mother on the other hand thinks I'm being ridiculous and should snap out of it. Oh I see, so it's okay for her to fear snakes because that's a common phobia, but not okay for me to fear using the phone because it's a part of everyday life and just sounds absurd? Phobias are about having an irrational fear of something. If I understood why I suffer heart palpitations, sweaty palms or why my mind races with mad thoughts when I need to make a call or when the phone rings, then I'd make it stop but I don't. Fear of telephones could come from having had bad experiences, having some kind of nervous disposition, self esteem issues, simply not having enough practice of using them… the list goes on.
In my case and I'm sure most others, I would pretty much apply all of the above which has compelled me to fear using telephones. The advice I was given though, is this: Encourage yourself to make/take 1 call a day, whether it is to contact a relative or make an enquiry; once you have managed this, make the challenge a little harder. Always take a deep breath beforehand and try to stay calm throughout the call. If for whatever reason a call doesn't go as well as you had hoped, don't be hard on yourself and try not to make such a deal of it; it's over and in most cases you won't have to speak to that person again. Remember: If you keep telling yourself you can't do it, then you don't allow yourself to even try... and it really doesn't hurt to try.
Anonymous
August 14 2005, 16:37:36 UTC 6 years ago
Re: telephonophobia
I just found this site after searching for a name for telephone phobia. Just s few minutes ago, I emailed a dear friend to tell her I cannot come over to her BBQ today (sounded nice when she asked but I really do not enjoy social gatherings if there is anyone I don't know involved, also i have a hard time doing things on the weekend - it always feels like my time is being sucked up into a vacuum). I hope she gets the email before it starts - I really do not want to seem rude, but I have to say - I will do just about anything not to have to call. I definitely have telephonophobia.The worst part about it for me is the guilt. I can call to order a pizza or make an appointment, I can call my parents. I have one friend who, if I see she has called, I can call her back. But that is about it. I am a teacher, and I do at times need to call parents at work. I hate it but I do. I literally have to force myself. Also, like some of you have said, I do find it easier to make calls from work - definitely something to do with the limitations for lengthy conversation, as well as maybe support from a few friends just being around.
I hate hearing the phone ring. I think I have always had a fear that it would be bad news about someone I care about - not that that has ever happened to me. I made my Mom promise that when my dog passed away, she would not tell me on the telephone. Just a few weeks ago, my family drove 3 1/2 hours to tell me in person. I was glad though.
I think I too have issues with not feeling in control of the situation. I don't enjoy chit chat as it is, unless I really like the people I talking with. I have a handful of friends I love talking to at work. But in general, talking on the phone just seems like a waste of time. I can't easily multi-task so it really is wasted time, especially if I get a long winded person on the other line. I also don't really care that much about the kind of things othe people like to talk about - stupid chit-chat. I hate "catching up". Iam not as anti-social as it may sound but all the talk is just so unnecessary!
It is a relief to see others have this issue. The problem with going to a psychiatrist or psychologist is that they will most definitely want to do cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and that is basically conquering your fear by doing what it is you hate in small increments. That is just about the last thing I feel like doing. Desensitization and training your brain to think in new patterns....hmm. The part of my thinking that I would like to change is caring about what others think (althoughI guess that might clear up the phone phobia).
I wish, however, that I could just go through life emailing, and leaving voicemails, calling only when I must, and not feel guilty. I feel awful right now about not being able to call my friend to tell her I am not coming over (which is another story anyway). I mean I could call her, but it is so uncomfortable!!
Anonymous
6 years ago
September 14 2005, 09:15:17 UTC 6 years ago
I hate the phone too.
I'm another telephone-phobic. When I know I have a call to make, I feel nervous & sick to my stomach. I even hate calling up for takeaway food or making a hairdresser appointment. I don't know what I'm afraid of, but I get a feeling of anxiety that I just can't shake.I can spend hours on the phone to my friends, & although I hate the sound of a ringing phone, I can answer one just fine. But the thought of making a call scares me.
I've always felt so stupid about it that I've only recently admitted it to a close friend, & even then, not been as specific as I'm being here. In real life, I'm a confident, friendly happy, attractive person (not to blow my own trumpet or anything!) - but on the phone I feel inferior.
I don't know what this has come from, I've had no bad experiences involving phones. My only idea is this - I was a very ugly duckling as a child, & only recently (after a lot of dental work) have I become even vaguely attractive. When I started getting attention for my appearance, I became a more confident person - the friendly person I am now. But when I get on the phone, suddenly I'm the scared, insecure, shy girl I used to be - & I hate being her.
Well anyway, I'm glad to hear there are others with this problem. Add one more freak to the list. :)
Anonymous
September 19 2005, 16:15:24 UTC 6 years ago
And to think I thought I was the only one...
Up until today I thought I was just rude not wanting to make any phone calls, even to my best friends, but after having broken down with tears after making a call (I was really nervous!) I thought I must have a real problem and looked it up in google. I especially hate calling people I know, chit-chatting, returning calls. I love e-mailing, writting real letters and I am OK with face-to-face, so why do I feel so auckward when I have to pick-up the phone? It just makes no sense! I wish I could throw my cell-phone away and I love it when I accidentally leave it at home. I wish there was a way I didn't have to use any kind of phones at all...Anonymous
October 4 2005, 00:01:24 UTC 6 years ago
Add me to the list!
I hate phones. I don't mind taking calls as much as making them, I HATE making calls! I'm on my own, and need to have a lot of work done on my house, which means calling numerous people (painters, plumbers, etc). I am so far behind, because I can't bring myself to pick up the phone! And the thing is, I know once I do it, I'll be fine. If I could just call, talk to someone and get it over with it'd be another story, but I keep thinking how I'll call, get a machine, leave a message and then I have to wait for the call back and that makes me a nervous wreck (I hate waiting for anything, too). And then what if I miss the call back. Then I'll have to call AGAIN and start over from scratch.I don't even like calling good friends. For one thing, my father always worried about me "bothering" someone at the wrong time. He'd always say things like, "I'm sure they have better things to do than to talk to you". I also don't like having to talk to anyone other than the person I'm calling for. One thing I like about cell phones is you usually don't have to worry about someone else picking up. It's a lot easier for me to call someone if there is something specific to discuss, but for idle chit-chat? NEVER!
The longer I go without making calls, the harder it is for me. I have a cousin who also hates phones, she lives in another state so naturally, we don't stay in touch very well! LOL! But it's nice to have someone in the family who understands.
Anonymous
October 11 2005, 01:44:18 UTC 6 years ago
One More out There
I'm a student journalist, and after realizing that I'll need to make a few phone calls to people I don't know in the next few days, I found this entry through a bit of Google research. I read the two years' worth of comments posted above, and realized that there are many others who share the same problem.But one issue I'm finding is that there aren't very many solutions.
Anonymous
October 23 2005, 05:13:23 UTC 6 years ago
I'm not alone!
I almost cried when I found this. I'm not alone! I'm not a freak of nature! Everyone around me spends 90% or their waking hours on the phone or cellphone. I had no idea that my fear was shared by other people!I don't know when my fear began, for all I know I've always been afraid of using the telephone. I didn't really realize that I had a phobia of telephones until calling people was expected of me. At one point I had to call the man who I was buying a car from. After three weeks of putting it off, my parents forced me to do it. I wrote a script for myself, and made the call. It rang three times, and I got the answering machine. It scared me so badly I started to cry.
And I'm a singer! An actress! I can't see the people in the audience and don't know who they are; I know they are judging me as I'm on the stage, but I don't get stage fright. Why the hell am I afraid of the telephone?
Now I feel much better about myself. Thank-you!
Anonymous
November 19 2005, 07:56:58 UTC 6 years ago
so i kinda like this LJ post
Like most everyone here, it seems kinda strange but reassuring at the same time to be reading all these posts. I'm a 22 year old guy of the type who is alright with answering the phone or talking on the phone once I am on it, but having to make a call stresses me out to no end. I also won't tell anyone about it because people just laugh it off and think I am joking or screwing around with them because I am fine talking to people in person and love email and instant messenger.I think my problem is that I never know how the person on the other end is going to react. I feel as if I am interrupting them in the middle of something else (why I hate calling peoples cell phones even more), or that they won't have time to talk. But for me, it helps a lot if they are expecting me to call, and then I know I have something specific to talk about. The worst is when I call someone and they are around other people and you can hear them talking still, its like I just interrupted them or they have something better to do.
Anyways, its reassuring to read all these other posts and realize that its not entirely me being entirely irrational or anti-social. As for what to do to help get over it? I'm not really sure, but i think reading these posts and talking with other people about it in this kind of environment is a help. I also noticed that of the people who have said their age, most seem to be in the late-teens or 20s range. I'm wondering if its a generational thing or if we are just the type of people who search on the internet for "fear of telephones" and "telephonaphobia". I guess probably the later.
-sam
Anonymous
February 27 2006, 05:36:25 UTC 6 years ago
Re: so i kinda like this LJ post
I am the same way, only if you can believe it I am a customer service rep and it is my job to answer the phone. I find that as long as it is work involved i can usually make a call but unless it is my mom i can not make any calls that are personal and even with my mom if i have called her and she was busy or in a bad mood i find i cant call back for hours and sometimes days. I have 3 kids and i cant call to make appointments for them i have to get my mom to do it. If i have to look for a job it has to be online because if i get a call and miss it I will never get the job because of the anxiety, the last message i got made me nauseated and sent me into a crying fit i couldnt stop for over an hour, never could bring myself to call them back. my co workers think it is hilarious but they also understand and help me out with returning calls if i trade off with them on other things.Anonymous
6 years ago
Anonymous
November 19 2005, 14:03:52 UTC 6 years ago
Telephonophobia
I have had a fear of phones for over 30 years ever since i recieved a threating phone call, since then i have been unable to make or recieve calls the thought of useing the phone makes me have a panic attack its really scary. the only time i answer the phone is on my mobile thats because its my husband or children i am ok with them, but if it its anyone else in the family i still cant use it. for years i thought i was been silly .then i looked up the phobias site to see if there was such i thing for fear of phones and then i found this site and realised there is called Telephonophobia and that there is lots of poeple like me .I was so releived i am not the only one i feel more relaxed now thank you. one more thing i would like to give you an exsample what happened to me on the mobile of mine.MY mobile rang and i thought it was one of my children [because my husband and children are the only ones who have my number] so i answered it on the other end it was the mobile operater just as they said who it was i said its not my phone and threw it to my husband and he done all the talking.its like a big weight been lifted off my shoulders knowing i am not the only oneNovember 24 2005, 13:01:57 UTC 6 years ago
Telephonophobic too!
I'm 24 (nearly 25) and over the years my fear of phones seems to be getting worse not better. As soon as I hear a phone ring no matter where I am, I could be in a shop where THEIR phone rings and still I feel my stomach wrenching up, I have to tell myself to stop being stupid as I'm not the one who needs to answer it.I've lost contact with my 3 best friends because I can't pick up the phone and call them (not to mention I don't live near enough to just go round to see them). They used to do all the calling so I guess they thought I couldn't be bothered. Thats not true I just feel so inferior when I try to use the phone.
I always feel pyshically sick to the stomach, my heart races, I feel faint, I shake and I just wanna cry when even just the thought of having to use the phone occurs. I'm fine calling my mum or boyfriend but thats all. I generally avoid the phone at all costs, I'm naturally shy anyway which doesn't help but I'm OK when face to face with people.
I guess I might need help for this huh? Does anyone else get other people not taking them seriously like me? because when I try to explain to people that I pyshically can't use the phone they think I'm putting it on or over-exaggerating. I'm sick of it, I wish I could be more normal. Oh well Guess I never will be... *smiles sadly*
Anonymous
December 9 2005, 05:25:15 UTC 6 years ago
Another telephonophobe here
I both hate to answer the phone and to make calls. I almost never answer the phone and I do everything I can to avoid making a call. I don't even like talking to family or friends on the phone; in fact, that's almost worse than talking to someone with whom you have specific business. I don't even like calling for take-out but I do do it sometimes. I also find that I can get on a roll after making a call and two and I try to get them all done in one go. I always feel sooo relieved after getting done with phone calls, especially to family and friends. On the job, I always hated it because I was afraid I'd be caught off guard--so much easier to be able to think a response through really carefully via e-mail (especially if it involved saying "no" to someone). Once I became a freelancer and worked from home, I no longer had to worry about the phone.I also hate answering the door and almost never do. Someone is invariably trying to sell something and I hate the uncomfortablness of trying to get rid of them.
I hate speaking in front of groups, even groups of people I know well. I hate chit-chat.
I like talking one-on-one to people I know well and enjoy. But I also enjoy being by myself and there are many times I don't want to talk to anyone, including spouse and children.
6 years ago
6 years ago
Anonymous
4 years ago
Anonymous
January 27 2006, 03:46:41 UTC 6 years ago
Telephophobia & my job
I'm 44 years old and have had this phobia since childhood. I don't know what started it, though I do remember one time when I was little, answering the phone when it rang and my mom getting mad at me. (I had hung up the phone before she realized I was on it, and I did not know who it was that called...)I just took a new job that I did not think would have much phone work at all. But know I'm finding that I do have to make a lot of phone calls and I am just sick about it! I absolutely dread it and will put calls off as long as possible or try to find other ways to deal with whatever it is rather than calling. This has gotten me in trouble on jobs before because I could not make myself make phone calls when I needed to and would have to cover my tracks.
I don't know what to do! I have to keep this job for now at least. I know I should get counseling, but my fear is so much that I don't really want to deal with the problem---I just don't want to answer the phones!
Anonymous
March 1 2006, 02:08:34 UTC 6 years ago
Re: Telephophobia & my job
Oh wow! I thought that I was the only one that was nuts. This is too weird. I am having a real hard time with this and sont know what to do about it. Everytime the phone rings it goes right through me and I get so nervous. If I answer it I stutter real bad and cant say the word Hello. It started about a year ago. Any suggestionsMarch 4 2006, 01:48:28 UTC 6 years ago
me too?
i have this phobia. but its only when i make calls to public places. like house phones or like take out places or where ever a live person answers, even with 411.the only people i can call are my parents (i cant even call my mothers work it scares me) and my friends/family but only on their cell phones. and my grandmother without feeling any anxiety or fear.
im only 15. and i dont want to ruin my life with this phobia.
sorry i saw your LJ on google and figured i would put my 2 cents in. :)
Anonymous
July 6 2006, 02:15:50 UTC 5 years ago
Re: me too?
I have this phobia as well! I know it was a long time ago thaT you wrote that and probably won't read this but for those of you out there that do read it, dont feel alone because I have it 2!! I'm not scared of the phone, Im scared of talking on it. I make my older sister who sounds like me make all my calls, but she usually refuses because she feels its making my phobia worse. I don't really consider it a phobia...maybe a social disorder? I don't really know but when I do bring myself to talk on the phone..I can't talk and than after I bring myself to say what I have to say (getting a job or something) I think that I said it all wrong and nag myself for hours...it's stressful. I truly hate talking on the phone...even worse I am scared of it :(← Ctrl← Alt
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